I try quite hard to keep a positive mindset. I find that if I focus on the good things in a situation that I do better to get through it. This year it has been exceptionally challenging to do this.
Some of the problems we (spouse and I) are facing are directly caused by us. We were doing well at the beginning of the year so we were not managing our money well (less well than I originally thought.) I quite my stable and good paying job (I do not regret it.) Now we are plagued by things that are seemingly out of our control but caused by our actions early this year.
My spouse has been unable to get a consistent job. My art is not selling well (I knew this was going to be the case.) People who want my art are having financial issues as well. I am not able to get a consistent job (waiting on the government to process some paper... really over 9 months!)
We do not qualify for most federal aide as we do not have children nor are we disabled.
I feel that we are in a pit and it is pouring rain out. The pit is slowly filling with sludge and we are getting covered instead of being able to float to the surface.
My eternal optimism says we will get through this, more or less intact. There is a part of me that would like to give up the fight and just walk away from everything. Live off grid in the mountains or something equally as difficult or impossible.
The optimism wins out, because I am an eternal optimist, even if I do not act like it.
In an effort to give myself a boost I found some quotes to share.
I am not drawing the quote today. I am NOT that optimistic right now. Plus I am working on getting ready for Jet City Comic Show in Tacoma, Washington this weekend.
Yes, yes, yes. I want to quit. I want to hide away and never show my face to the world again. Yet, I will not. I want to share my art with everyone. I want to make them see and feel and think new things. So I will keep going, because I have not accomplished my goal yet.
I was "busy" Friday. Sheer stubbornness made me waste a bunch of time on something. I could have been working on other things.
I am doing this one. I have never done a lot of the things that I did this year. I am learning and growing.
I make lots of these. I try a lot.
Thank you for reading.
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